William K. – Washington DC Yelpers / 1 Star
Perhaps I’m just an elitist, @sshole, demanding, and have expectations, which is all probably true, but the reviews for Business and services, and whatever else from Yelpers in the Washington DC area are complete crap. I mean they are horrible. Now, you might think, “horrible? that’s pretty hyperbolic.” Well let me tell you that horrible is the least of my feeling, and my hyperbole isn’t fit for a causal reader. So let me review the reviewers of DC with what would be a good review, BLUF format. Expectations explained, rating criteria and the reasons for meeting, exceeding, or failing to achieve explained, and my personal take. That’s what good review looks like.
DC Yelpers suck. When I give a review I like it to be based on standards of acceptability that most others are naturally aware of or inclined to agree on. Then when I rank someone against those standards i like to explain where they failed to meet what was expected. Enunciate the deficiency explicitly, using near objective standards. Well apparently that isn’t the standard to be a DC Yelper…no here it appears I can just give someone 3 stars out of five and state nothing other than there was a wait on Sunday brunch at a really popular spot. You know and not state any deficiency because I’m a DC Yelper and I have some irrational standard that I expect you everyone to already know since the world is centered around me!
Oh wait I don’t live in an inoculated bubble and expect everything to conform to how I would do things. Rather I only have expectations that are not just rational to me, but rational to others making them reasonable. Guess I’m in the minority here on the DC yelp scene.
What a concept: A Yelper who appears to understand that Yelp should be something more than a platform for the lowest common denominators among us to religiously comment on fecal matter, fast food, body parts, drunken escapades, graveyards, unrealistic expectations, celestial bodies, narcotics, clown farts, internet porn and the other sort of daily minutiae that make sites such as Facebook so very necessary. We hope his critique doesn’t fall entirely on deaf ears…But our upcoming posts unfortunately will tell a different story.